Things A Single Should Do Over Social Media

Social Media can be “not so great” if you’ve not got another person you can share your problems with. It can be a best friend too, but then friendships aren’t as exciting these days. While, I am a single myself I can relate to every person who wants to fast forward through February. Don’t worry people, I stand with you and am proud of you for getting past this extremely torturous month. The very little I can do, I will do. Give you ideas about being a lot cooler. One is to not drag introductions. So, here we go.

1. Troll couples on Social Media. 

This is an extremely cool way to pass time. If you’re unhappy, make everyone else feel the pain. There are lots of ridiculous, atrocious, head paining, horribly offensive stuff on the web. You just need to choose ‘em one by one and share them through your various Social Media accounts. Something like, “There’s life, there’s death, and then there’s getting into a relationship with someone who hates sex” is a good start. You can only make your posts worse from here.

It’d be a huge hit, especially on Twitter! Nobody would realize your pain. So what are you waiting for? Ah, 5 more points … I see.

2. Brag about being single!

If you see the glass “half full” even when it’s empty. I am apologetic for my previous point. You don’t need to change yourself, but what you can do is as effortless, and as annoying – to everyone else. It’s all about you. Why care about people!? So, start bragging about how cool being single is. Tell everyone you don’t need anyone in life. None to complete you because you’re a solved Algebraic expression. As clear as it gets. Start with: “India’s Prime minister is ‘single’. India’s greatest President was single. Salman Khan is virgin. Patrakar PopatLal is too and I am the coolest thing since the ‘Ice age’. Priceless.

3. Advice: Nothing beats a Single giving Relationship advices!

Find happiness sadistically. Don’t mind hearts being shattered or relationships being broken to make yourself laugh. Lots of people come to me for relationship advises, and I on almost all instances spend hours trying to get people to “walk out” of their relationship. If you’re to tell me how your boyfriend and girlfriend didn’t pick up a call of yours, I’d give up my life trying to prove how big an unpardonable CRIME that is, and why you should dump that ignorant, mean idiot! 

Example: 

Friend: Buddy, I think he might be cheating on me.

Your advice should be: Ah, according to the University of Oxford if you think your partner is cheating on you, dump them. History suggests that 99. 9% times they are cheating. Having known your boyfriend he has nothing in him to suggest he’d be in the 0.1%. Spice it up!

4. Disgrace Tinder, TrulyMad and ALL dating sites!

Nothing makes you look cooler than everyone knowing you’re single and you don’t have a Tinder account! It’s okay if you’ve one, but that girl or boy you’re tweeting to doesn’t need to know that. Go a step further and start posting about how dating sites are ruining the essence of relationships. How you’ve lost trust in relationships because everyone is selfish. Probably add up a fake High school love story for extra flavours. Tell everyone how your partner cheated on you. How you’ve kept people who’ve loved you at one hand distance. Let them know that you don’t care about what people think and say. (Wo)Man, you’re in for being a total bad@ss!

5.) Flirt!

If everything else is hard, and you can’t stop yourself, and being single is as difficult as “being human” for you. Add that Tinder ain’t working as well. Flirt. Twitter is a great place to start. Everyone understands your pain. Start with posting about being “friendzoned” or “brozoned” or maybe tweet a simple “Ah, I am so lonely. I don’t want to live anymore.” Something like a “Truth or Dare” game where you just tell them how good you feel about them and how they are like sneezing – do clarify that they too stop your heartbeat and they are as awesome as the next Avengers movie. Say anything you like and think to be convenient. Of course, you don’t have to pay anything. Flatter the next person till they say, “Baby, I love you. You sound better than my gramophone“. Destiny could work wonders. Things like “I know I am not good enough for you” and “Bae, you make me cry” are even better. Good luck.

6. Meditate! Exercise! Gain!

Not everything needs to be about Social Media. If you’re not on any Social Media, which has minimal possibility. You can do better things than just killing your time on the web.Not that it’s lame, I do it 24×7. Still you can do boring stuff outside it. One of ‘em is getting healthier. Health is wealth as you know, and what better than giving your body – time. We’re living increasingly bad lifestyles and aging is due to be much worse than previous generations. So exercise! Not just your muscles, but also your brain, and if possible also your heart – Nothing philosophical, I am talking about doing cardio exercises you fool. 

Fact: Exercising makes you lot happier. I’d love to give you a link to find more about this, but I am already exhausted from my hours of Twitter Yoga. 

Here’s a WTF image to go with a WTF post! Captions needed?

Thanks for reading, waiting to hear from you, friend! Keep smiling!

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100 Things I Need to Tell YOU – The Third 25

Life advises, inspiration and more stuff is to be served. Enjoy yourselves. I have already told you 50 things of the 100, and here are 25 more, not counting the zero.

0. Live a life without limits.

1. You’re not supposed to be right all the time.

2. All things having life will always have imperfections, but that shouldn’t stop you from trying to attain perfection.

3. If your only goal is money, you may end up unhappy most probably.

4. Don’t preach stuff you don’t know about. There’s a reason I don’t talk about making money online, even though I’ve a great desire to do so.

5. Not everyone needs to agree with you.

6. Never spend time criticizing a person, unless you are getting paid, or the person requests for it.

7. To the readers: Never judge a book by its cover. I’m sure you’ve heard it before, am repeating again.

To the content makers: A great book cover is a must.

8. Stop complaining about all the people un-following you on Social Media. By posting such stuff, you’re giving more people reasons to bid you farewell.

On a related note, I checked out all the un-follows I got on Twitter today, and it hurts, but it’s okay.

9. If you have too many people blocking you, you ain’t using Social Media in the most productive way.

10. Having a dictionary app on the phone helps.

11. It’s “Bay of Bengal” on the world map above the Indian ocean, and not the “BAE of Bengal”.

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12. Be generous.

For the next 100 days, make it a point to give praise and approval to those who deserve it.

[Credit: Lifehack’s article 60 Small Ways to Improve Your Life in the Next 100 Days]

13. On the day of this post being written, a friend of mine who’s into his final year of B.Tech, met with an accident. His bike skit, and he’s got multiple injuries to boast off, and a “thrilling” moment to remember as well. In his own words, he was inches away from being run over by a bus, he saw death.

It’s an unpredictable life.

14. Life is precious, and is worth the struggle. Always.

15. “Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.” [Source: Internet]

16. Life can anytime get better. Have faith. Here’s an example of a person who shares the 7 things she learned after her failed suicide attempt.

I am grateful I survived. I am grateful for my second chance at life. I am content with knowing that if I die tomorrow I will do so being at peace with what I have done and accomplished. I am even more fulfilled knowing that I do not want to die tomorrow.

Read her story at thoughtcatalog.c om by clicking here.

17. “Should I kill myself, or have a cup of coffee?” – Albert Camus

18. Laugh at yourself, accept your flaws.

19. Crack silly jokes. Which reminds me of a question I needed to ask.

Q. What did the moon tell the Sun?

A. Baby, you’re so hot. I wish you liked night outings.

20. Ask for help. Find people who are willing to help.

21. Make it a habit to ignore negative posts/talks on Social Media. Yes, ignorance is bliss. Many people use Social Media to rant, and vomit all the trash. If there’s lesson and wisdom coming along, okay. Otherwise, push the mute button.

22. Read and hear motivational stuff, be around positive people. Fill your stock of “reasons to live”. In the darkest night, you shouldn’t struggle to find your “hope”.

23. Stay optimistic, have self respect, confidence, and wit. However, always stay humble.

24. There’s no dead person who changed the world.

25. I can go on saying, and I am not “depression proof” as well. I am not a survivor either, and no expert for sure.

Life has been kind to me, and give it a chance always, there’s every reason, it will be kind to you.

Thanks for reading. Another part to come, will see you soon with it. Till then, let me know what you feel about this set of 25.

101 Reasons you should follow me on Twitter

LOOK filling up a blog post with 101 reasons is a great task, and so is reading it. I wouldn’t want to waste your time. You should follow me on any social media, but for now 101 reasons to follow me (@RahulSingh_I) on Twitter. The reasons are:

1. The most obvious “I Follow back.”

2. I Tweet. Not a good enough reason? Well, people love to un-follow inactive accounts. So, It’s not too bad reasoning. If that’s not enough…

3. I retweet. If you look at my account you’ll find out that I RT good tweets, and actually anything that interests me.

4. If RT-ing is a reason. “Heart-ing” or “liking” should be too. Especially, if I like you. I favourite almost everything.

5. I don’t send automated DMs. If you’re on Twitter, and don’t thank me for not acting a robot. You aren’t active enough.

6. I won’t share Instagram images on Twitter. Heck, I don’t have an Instagram account.

7. I don’t share a blog post more than once. If you don’t want to read my writings, you just need to ignore once. Like a second, and the post won’t haunt you ever again. I won’t mind that as well. Plus, there’s a fair chance that following me for years, you might never see a blog post of mine. Twitter’s too quick, too much happening, always.

8. I don’t tweet about politics. Is that a plus? Okay. 

[Update: Occasionally, I may do a tweet on politics, but still politics ain’t my topic.]

9. I don’t follow any politician besides whoever is the President or PM of India. Out of respect.

10. I don’t tweet about Kim Kardashian.

11. I ignore really horrible tweets such as this:

Link? Error 404: I just told you I ignore them.

12. Neither do I RT something like this..

13. Nor anything like this.. I would not want to risk tweeting or RT-ing something that asks me to try to beat up a man build like a Tank. You shouldn’t too. Follow me for this million dollar advice for free.

14. Nor this…

I tweeted this myself. Why God why?

15. Nor this.. (I didn’t RT this, but quoted it. Ain’t this tweet cool?)

16. I will tweet with the coolest GIFs soon..

17. I don’t follow “News Anchors”.

18. I have blocked a famous politician on Twitter. No names, but that’s a moral achievement. I get to mute a politician. WOW. I should be followed for doing this.

19. I find the best inspirational quotes. Though that’s not too hard.

20. I RT tweets with the coolest facts and tips.

21. I have over 1600 cool people following me. So you can too. Okay, I’m not bragging too much, that’s just because I Follow back.

22. I won’t unfollow you unless you’re tweeting objectionable content.

23. I don’t block people, unless you’re here to insult a “nation” or “race”.

24. Again, I tweet a lot, but I won’t irritate you. Really, promise. Kind of.

25. Just follow me so you can wish me a happy birthday on 22nd May every year (Honestly, I have a birthday that falls on May 22 every year. Isn’t that amazing?).

26. I reply to every non automated message.

27. If you’re a blogger or do anything content related, I will see, read and RT your stuff.

28. I don’t make unnecessary jokes. I can come up with a reason for everything I vomit. The reason is because I overate. See.. vomit, overeating. Okay, sorry. Next..

29. My Twitter is the door to a great brain. It’s the reflection of everything that goes in my head. It must be a privilege to read my thoughts in 140 characters or less. Should it be?

30. I contribute to trends. I can come up with something for any hash-tag. Ain’t I cool?

31. Example for Point 30.

32. And another..

Nobody RT’d this tweet

33. Me at my best. I have rocking advices.

34. The way I translate…

35. I’m the height of being optimistic and defy the rules. Okay.

36. If you’ve ever wanted people to ask questions. I’m your guy.

37. I don’t do sponsored tweets..

38. Never will I tweet something like this.. again

38. As weird as I can be, I’m no more a teen. So, I won’t be making “The world s*cks” tweets. I pledge:

39. I know who Muhammad Ali was IS.

Not giving a link to the profile here, but a girl tweeted that Ali was a great footballer, better than Ronaldo and Messi. She got more than 8K RTs for this. Later she claimed to confuse Ali with Pele. All this when the world was paying tributes to the legend.

40. I never bother myself with being part of “#IStandWith__” movements. People should understand that everyone is equal before the law. No matter how well they sing, how cute they look, or how much people love ’em.

41. I may crack a joke on you, but only to cheer you up, or if I know you well.

42. I never tweet anything to spread hate. Most tweets are like:

43. I don’t even talk about “love”. Things have got too cheesy these days.

44. I ignore all extremists. Everyone normal active Twitter user should be paid for that.

45. I don’t unnecessarily RT celebrities. That’s not bad though, it’s really cool to RT anything one wants, but seeing celebrities being RT-ied for stupid stuff makes me jealous. Anyone like me? Follow me.

46. If you like Cricket. I don’t make too many Cricket tweets these days, but I know my game. See, my Cricket tweets with typos gets RTs too. I’m just too cool.

47. Not following Tennis can’t stop me from Tweeting about it. Murray fans here?

I won’t embed a tweet here. Just asking you Tennis fans: How many Grand-Slams does Murray has in him? Will Federer win another?

48. Same with Soccer. Ronaldo or Messi?

49. Every 4 years you’ll see me Tweeting about Olympics.

50. I wish Happy Birthdays. (Mine is on 22nd May)

51. I always have something for a #Flashback

52. I promote people.. including myself.

After this list article, I don’t think I need  anything to prove it.

53. I provide #MondayMotivation

54. #WesnesdayWisdom

55. #ThursdayThoughts or sometimes Tuesday ones too.

56. #FridayFeelings

57. Sometimes, everything at once.

58. I promote people everywhere. I will promote this person for interacting with all my stuff because I use the like option for all her tweets too. Anyways..

59. This dude too for the same reasons.

A shout out on the blog for the RT and edits man.

60. This person as he replies to my tweets.

61. I will promote your stuff. Look I gave you enough evidence as well now.

62. I troll my best friend there.

63. I have an “Incredible People” section on this blog, and if you have something astonishing about you. Let my millions of readers know you. But, follow me and DM me first.

[SIDE NOTES: Million of readers aren’t there, but I’m positive.]

64. I will help you find YouTubers. Not the Internet celebrities, but the hidden gems. Here’s one:

65. And poetesses..

66. And bloggers too..

67. And I know Fitness Gurus.

Don’t disturb him while he’s working out, here’s a silent link.

68. And writers obviously

69. My friend’s list includes aliens sharing insane stuff as well..

70. I too have a book coming..

71. Even if you don’t like reading, follow me because I won’t force you to read me.

72. If you still hate me, just follow and mute me. I like my numbers on Twitter.

73. I got more than 100 RTs once. That shows I’m rad. Just follow me for this alone.

74. I don’t cry for being single, not on Twitter for sure.

75. I don’t even talk about relationships and why everyone should break up.

76. My amazing He – She tweets.

77. People with blue ticks follow me. Okay.

78. I myself have a blue tick coming up, and you would love a celebrity following you. Do you?

79. This one’s a great reason: I need you. I treasure you. I’m desperate, and I don’t measure you.

80. I don’t really know what #78 means, but I’m cool, and I can rhyme things up. Follow me for that.

81. I have got health tips.

Stay happy. Laugh more, and stop seeking health tips from me. You’ll be fine.

82. I am a master at ruining stuff.

83. Unlike many, whether you like 1D or any other band. I still like and respect you. Though I still like to have fun.

84. I take puns on me in a light hearted manner.

85. I will give you birthday reminders (on 22nd May specifically).

86. I like all responsible Twitter users tweet on #WorldWaterDay #WorldEnviornmentDay and everything (Not necessarily I do anything about it in real life).

87.  I don’t pretend doing cool things I don’t do.

88. I have got Math tips.

89. I have also got Twitter tips. You just need to ask.

I need Twitter tips as well though.

90. If you’re a girl. Keep calm, the chances of “I” flirting is really minimal.

91. If you’re a boy, the chances of myself flirting are even lesser.

92. Follow me because there’s no one else like me.

93. I have got tons of gratitude and respect, and people with thousands of followers like the way I think.

94. Sometimes I give shout-outs as well..

95. Follow me because you’re on Twitter, and you don’t have to pay for following people. Okay.

96. I have infinite wisdom you can miss out on, like all the people on Quora.

97. Like infinite wisdom..

What? Was this tweet not supposed to be linked here?

98. RTs are not endorsements. I don’t know why people say this. An RT is a… RT. I like this line though. RTs are not endorsements.

99. I’m not always serious, but I can be. I have opinions, and I share ’em publicly. If you appreciate this follow me.

100. Pro-wrestling fans out there. Follow me. I would love to talk about it.

LESNAR won..

101. Aren’t 100 enough? If not, reread point 1.

Thank you, and sorry. 

This post was presented to you by Rahul Singh (@RahulSingh_I).

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Again, 22nd May… every year.

Read, and share.. Not just on Twitter. Thank you.